Sunday, February 8, 2015

50 Shades of Grey Part 2: 50 Shades of Meh

So, in the first part of this post I talked about how I decided to try to read 50 Shades of Grey. As I said, I've always been against reading this book, but I was curious enough to try and see what all the hype was about. In Part 1 I gave a not-so-brief synopsis of the portion of the book I read, now I'd like to discuss some of the things I noticed as I tried to read the book.


1. This book is not well written! Nothing is more annoying than trying to read a book that pays no attention to grammar, sentence structure, or details. When a book with terrible writing becomes insanely popular I feel sad for where our society is headed.

2. Literally, every thought Ana has is preceeded with an "Oh my!". It's as if her head is so empty that this is her only available thought. "Oh my!" I kind of get that it's supposed to be a cute perosnality trait, but it really starts to get annoying.

3. Much like #2^^, Christian tells Ana to stop biting her lip every few seconds because it makes him want to F*** her. If Ana feels the need to constantly chew her lip then she should be able to do that without Christian getting mad at her because he can't control his sexual urges. Okay, okay, maybe it was kind of hot the first or second time, but by the 20th time I just want Ana to say, "I bite my lip, Christian! Get over it!"

4. When Ana starts spending more time with Christian he starts getting more commanding and moody, which is sexy, right? Seriously, his mood changes every few minutes. If another boy, even one that Ana insists she's only friends with, gets near her Christian is automatically stand-offish and cold. Frankly, it would be exhausting to be with someone like that.

5. I can't help but notice the similarities between 50 Shades of Grey and Twilight, which is a book I actually enjoyed reading. The main character is a clumsy brunette that doesn't think very highly of herself. She meets a mysterious and gorgeous boy/man who is obsessed and overprotective of her. He also tells her that he is wrong for her, but will not leave her alone. I'm told that 50 Shades started off as a Twilight fan fiction, which would explain these parallels and also the bad writing.

6. Lastly, what girl wants a man who wants her to be his sex slave? Christian wants Ana to do everything he tells her all the time, not just sexually, and if she doesn't obey him then he gets to punish her. He wants her to accept any punishment he decides to give her gladly. Seriously? When did this become sexy or desirable? Since when does a man wanting to completley dominate a woman to the point where she can't look him in the eye or touch him become exciting? Personally, I would not have had a problem walking away from this man, no matter how gorgeous he was. Oh, what? You don't like it when I roll my eyes at you're deranged ideas? Well, that's too dang bad! And no you may not bend me over your knee, pull my pants down, and spank/massage my butt 18 times just to show me who's boss. If anyone is the boss, it's me, ok?

7. ^^ Really? "Laters, baby?" Does this embarrass anyone else?


1. Why did I keep reading this book? Because it was actually pretty interesting at first. I wanted to find out what happened. Also, as the book went on there were a few plot points the author used to keep it interesting. Why does Christian Grey have such a problem with wasted food? Why doesn't he like to be touched on his chest? (I still don't know the answer to this one). So, kudos for keeping it interesting.

Honestly, 50 Shades of Grey is known as an erotic, sexual book, but the sex isn't even the worst part. Granted, I stopped reading before they got into the weird stuff and I actually skipped almost all the sex scenes I came across (almost), but everyone knows its a sexual book. What I really had a hard time with was the bad writing, repetition, and the fact that this man we are supposed to be lusting over is seriously troubled. I'm really hoping that all the girls who read this book know that this man isn't someone to hope for. Like really.

First Attempt at reading 50 Shades of Grey: FAILED

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